Sox Offenders

The Red Sox will enter the 2009 post-season as the American League Wild Card team. While “just getting there” has proven to be a successful strategy based on the recent World Series winners, there is something to be said for home field advantage. Both the Yankees and the Red Sox are dominant home teams. And now, if the planets align, the Sox will need to win at least one in the Bronx to get to the World Series. I would have put the hammer down for the past few weeks to steal the division back. I can’t say I’m thrilled, but I throw myself at the mercy of Tito’s record and I have to be satisfied.

And with that, I re-invest my faith that Tito’s unorthodox decisions and weak line-ups of late are all part of a master plan. When you really think about it, what else can it be? Who out there in Red Sox Nation believes Jason Varitek will have any role in the playoffs aside from keeping Victor Martinez properly hydrated and running “Heidi interference” for Tito. But in terms of “the plan” Tek played a big part. His flailing around for another 0-for-4 like a retarded kid trying to break a piñata: simply boosting Joba’s confidence and setting him up for failure next month. His inability to come within ten feet of throwing a runner out: pick-off city in the playoffs.

Saturday’s line-up card was almost enough to tip off Yankee brass. Think about it: Rocco Baldelli, Jed Lowrie, Chris Woodward and Brian Anderson all starting against C.C. Sabathia. That fat load is going to flip the calendar and actually think he can get guys out in the fall! Seriously, people, Paul Byrd? In the season finale against the Yankees? Consider it a nice massage, happy ending included, for A-Rod and company.

Forget everything you saw this past weekend in the Bronx. Forget the sweep, forget Lester limping off the mound, and forget the 16-7 mini-massacre: it was all part of Tito's plan. Every move, everything you think you saw, was engineered by the great puppet master himself, Terry Francona. That ball off Lester’s leg was an example of high-tech robotics and holograph technology so perfect I almost believed Lester was really hurt. And Monday’s “late scratch” of Josh Beckett due to “back spasms” is the final nail in the coffin for New York. Game, set, match.


Like Red, I wanted the division. I wanted it bad. But when the playoffs start and the Sox are dicing up opponents like a Chop-O-Matic, it will be Tito's name we praise. The mild-mannered, tea-drinking facade will come off, revealing the guy that has brought us two World Series championships. Faith, once again, will be rewarded.

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